So far this week, I've flown to Kentucky and back. I survived two big meetings at work, one happening exactly ten minutes after I walked in the office after coming back.
I buried my grandmother. I broke down repeatedly, some of these in front of people, which is um -not at ALL like me.
I was the only non-married person in attendance, and believe me, there were alot of people in attendance. It was the first time my whole family had been together since all my cousins have gotten married.
I felt like that scene in Sex and the City, when Miranda's mother died, and she said that her sister was worried about her because she was single. "Forget the coffin! There's a single thirtysomething woman walking behind it!" Miranda didn't realize that you need a date to go to a funeral. I didn't either.
I started crying when I walked up at the very end to say goodbye and there was no one holding my hand. Of course, everyone there adores me and loves me and is there for me to no end. But no one was holding just MY hand. I didn't focus on that actually, too much, at the time. I was too busy doing what I was supposed to be doing -honoring Granny's life. And she had a good, full one. It was difficult to walk away from her for the last time.
This was on Tuesday.
Then last night, my bedroom flooded. I am staying home from work today to get this taken care of, and its a hell of a task. Everything is soaked.
And the irony? I'm scheduled to fly BACK to Kentucky tonight so I can have a vacation next week. Ha! Boy, isn't this going to be relaxing.
My best friend said today that she couldn't remember me having a worse week. I agreed.
So -that is me today, and that is where I'm at. I'm reading your blogs, just being a quiet commenter, because I don't have much good to say at the moment. I am hanging in there.
I had plenty of moments of sweetness this week wtih my family --cousins, neices and nephew, sisters. One of my sisters saw my breakdown start and I was alone holding my head in my hands and she came running over to me, nearly throwing her kid down on the floor in the process. It was touching, to me.
Off to unload the dryer. Again.