Life ain't all that bad. I'm going through a period of stillness, I think, and I've been spending alot of time just kind of reflecting on things. Not in a bad way though....not in the "oh my dear lord, what does it ALL MEAN?!" kind of way. As we all know, I can tend to walk on the melancholy side of the road, and only really find myself savoring people and things when they are either 1) far away, 2) in my past.
I was walking down my street the other day and it's just beautiful. It really is and it looks like something out of a movie sometimes. I walk by Afghani, Lebanese, Polish, Bangladeshi, and Thai food restaurants everyday and that's just on my street. I tuck away in the basement of a gorgeous house and I doubt I'll ever have an experience similar to the way I'm living now. So why do I want so desperately to know what's going to happen when I turn this page? When I do move on, and when I do leave DC for god-knows-where?
One of my favorite songs in college -and still now- was "Be Like That" by 3 Doors Down. In my sorority house, my dorm room window opened out onto the awning of the house--you can see it behind us in the picture here: (I am, of course, the short one).
Anyway, we used to sit out on this awning all the time and sometimes at night I'd go out and watch all the people pass and I could see the neighborhood on the other side of the street and I distinctly remember the lyrics of Be Like That going through my head, or sometimes through the window while a CD played:
"She spends her days up in the north hall
Watching the people as they pass
And all she wants is just a little piece of this dream
Is that too much to ask?
For a safe home, and a warm bed, on a quiet little street"
And you know what?
I got it.
"If I could be like that, what would I do?...."
7 comments:
There's always that "Be careful what you wish for" saying.
Oh honey. You ponder all you need to. You're doing a lot of good things and this is probably a very important time in your life whether you realize it now or not. At the very least, you are defining what you really want and need.
I think I did get what I wish for :) I just have trouble appreciating it in the moment.
Finally got over here tonight, I'm sorry. Yes, yes, and I know what you mean, sister mine. Thinking of you.
Contentment is so frustrating sometimes! ;)
I'm glad you posted. It's only been two days and I'm having major withdrawal issues. Only 38 more to go...
Oh Steph, well said and felt.
Be like that.
You are super cool and what you are doing rocks. Glad you are starting to feel tha magic.
YOU are the magic.
Stillness is good. Reflecting is good. Sending you hugs. When are you coming my way again?
We have more in common than just our height. I always hear "you don't know what you've got till it's gone" in my head. I'm very sentimental in retrospect, and can't learn to love now as much as I should.
I love your street. I love the amazing array of restaurants. I love that you are following your dreams and I understand wondering every step of the way if this is where you should be and what next, and, and, and.... Unstill minds are their own burden. Glad you took a moment to see the beauty around you. And like Ms. Moon says, be careful what you wish for, you just might get it. Here's a lyric for you.."these are the days you'll remember.."
Oh my. I watched waiting for Superman. I feel so conflicted now, about whining about my blue ribbon rich suburban school when the problem is of such great magnitude. The numbers - the data - I was a geographer once, and social geography for me was the greatest eye opener. We are our demographics, they shape everything, and dropout rates that high, well, it's awful. My problem is the tip of the iceberg. So glad to hear the Pres. addressing education. Left my 50cents worth on Melody Barnes' page, and stand ready for who knows what next. Maybe back to the Robin Hood book project, collecting from the rich to give to the poor. Books can make such a huge difference. Anyway, thanks for getting me to watch that sobering movie sooner rather than later.
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