Monday, May 14, 2012


Spinning and twisting and turning.

My life carries on - everything is going well. This seems like a miracle in an of itself: I am fine. I am softening around the edges; I can feel myself letting things go that I once held so important. I am walking, still in pain with many steps from the broken ankle. This weekend marks 7 months since the break itself.

Let's let that sink in. Only seven months...seems like a thousand years ago. The scars haven't faded much though. No way can I wear anything less than socks and tennis shoes this summer, but I really don't care since that's what I usually like to wear anyway. I am not a sandals wearing woman. I'm 31 years old, and I ain't changing. And I don't care anymore. Maybe this is part of getting older.

I've been busy as hell. Huge work projects happening, wrapping up, carrying on.

I went to Baltimore last week to give a presentation. I give alot of those these days. 4-5 years ago, I used to shake when talking on conference calls. I used to have to hide my shaking hands under the table; sometimes I'd be sick with anxiety--literally sick. Now, I just hop right up and start the powerpoint and go. I still get nervous sometimes of course, since I'm not exactly talking about mundane things and I'm terrified if anyone raises their hand for a question since I am still not exactly nuanced on all things health care, but...I've learned how to say "I don't know, but I'll look into it and get back to you if you'll give me your card later." The end.

I'm learning.

BTW, it wasn't raining in Baltimore, and since I gave the presentation to my old company that I worked for in Kentucky, everything was decidedly NOT the same.

But in a good way.


In a great way.

This Saturday, I am going HOME. Home, home for the first time since Christmas! I can't wait to cuddle up with my nieces and nephews, and force the ones taller than me to sit in my lap so I can kiss their cheeks. As hard as I've been working lately and relatively enjoying most of it...I need a break, desperately. I haven't had a day off since I started the job, except for one when I ended up working from home much of the day anyway.

I suppose that's not much to report, afterall. But the world is still spinning here in our nation's captiol, and I am spinning right along with it.
Keep thinking good thoughts about a FULL ankle recovery by the end of the summer.



janzi said...

Oh its so nice to see you again back blogging.. From your notes you have been so busy, no wonder you need a holiday.. I hope you have a super one, you deserve it... As your ankle heals, I bet you are getting fed up with it, but it will get better and you will be able to wear prettier shoes again. My daughter broke her ankle and felt like you, but it took a year to feel bit more normal, and now you would not ever know that she had broken it badly... no limping or other signs, so keep your chin up... your presentations sound riveting, bet your audience enjoy them too.. Have a great week, and looking forward to seeing you again soon.. hugs from across the pond.. we are still waiting for summer too!! j

Ms. Moon said...

Those are wonderful words. I think we really start to be ourselves in our thirties and as I always say- the forties are the best decade. Well, they were for me in some ways.
I know you are going to have a wonderful time at home. You DO need a break.
Bless you, honey. Have FUN!

liv said...

You are fine indeed! So nice to hear all those newsy things going on in your world.

Have great fun with your family. Kissing little round cheeks is a memorable pleasure and I am so glad you'll get some of that.

A year and about a 1/2 it took for my ankle to not speak to me anymore. Yours sounds perfectly normal for the 7 months mark.

Softening around the edges and letting things go? You're way ahead of the curve. I'm just getting the grasp of that in my 60's, no wonders I like you so much :)