Sickness and Snow

This could be the most boring post ever, so I'm at least adding pictures!








Today was the first time I've left my house since Monday. Kentucky has been smacked with an ice/snow storm that has left thousands without power or water. My parents (both sets) are without electricity and one is camped out with an aunt and uncle (I think), and the other set is making due with a wood-burning stove and fireplace.

My office has been closed for the last two days--our very first snow days ever! We get delays and stuff but never a shutdown like this. Which has been wonderful because I've been sick as a dog (I hate that expression, but still, it comes out) since this past weekend.

I hate being around other people when I am sick and feeling my most vulnerable so it hasn't been that bad. On the other hand, I desperately need to see a doctor. I keep running a fairly high fever and I think I have either strep throat or bronchitis or whatever, either way, it's nothing good. If I need antibiotics (I rarely do, it seems to just be a once-a-year deal for me) I wish I could just get them. I am making due with Tylenol and hot tea, but on the whole, the last few days have been fairly miserable.

But, being off work has helped tremendously and I'm so glad that if I have to be sick, I got sick right now. Today though, I had a friend come to fetch me and take me to Rite-Aid and then actually helped me scrape inches of ice off my car in case I can venture out tomorrow and go to work or the doctor...it was nice to get out and get some air, it actually made me feel better.

It's been an interesting couple of days and I realize how grateful I am to be "connected" virtually through Facebook and blogging, etc because with no one to talk to (not that I had a voice anyway) but my lovely little kitten, it can get old. Fast.

Grateful to be connected to friends, not quite as grateful to be connected to work, which carried on as usual thanks to webmail.

And glad to be with power, with heat, and with tylenol :)

What is it about this time of year that awakens my senses and heightens my awareness at all levels? I have so much to say that it is hard to know where to start—I guess that’s a cliché for a reason. I keep thinking about Obama’s impending inauguration, which is alternately thrilling me and scaring me into a rushed sense of “let’s-just-get-this-overwith-so-it-can-really-be-real-and-can’t-be-somehow-taken-away” urgency. I want to savor this precious point in history, which waits on the brink of…greatness? Hopefully. The unknown—certainly. A new day, new beginning.

This is one of those times when I miss living in DC. Many times that city crosses my mind, dances in and out of my consciousness when I hear a certain song or clutch a cold beer. At work when I still catch myself looking around for former co-workers to tell them a funny story. But this—oh this excitement is something that can’t be matched anywhere else but right there. Right there in the crowded and small and cold downtown with its white marble etched with names of those long ago gone.

Etched with memories for me, on every block.

I remember when President Reagan died, and his funeral processional was to pass through downtown DC on its way to the Capitol to lie in state for a few days before burial. Work let us go early that day, in a nod to the historic nature of the event, which was extremely out of character for my boss. But she relented and we jumped on the metro and ran to sidewalks to bear witness to history.

I stood with my friend beside a tree, among a huge crowd but somehow I was in the front. I waved at Nancy Reagan who stared forlornly out the car window before waving back at me. I stared at the casket of the man who was President when I was born.

It slowly passed by and we watched it until it turned the corner. We patted ourselves on the back for participating, and then I’m sure, went off in search of beer.

I felt a sort of energy in the air that day, and during the many days when I had the chance to watch history unfold before my eyes before casually walking back home to heat up a frozen pizza.

But this is the time to be in DC, and I am not. I have a twinge of regret about this, but it is okay. I will watch on TV with the rest of the nation as we place a black man in our nation’s highest office and I'm not sure I will be able to hold back the tears. I will think about the symbolism of that moment, but also about the reality beyond the racial barriers being broken in front of my eyes. I will think about the reality of a nation awakening to change and advancing toward a new kind of future. I will think about how, on a warm day in November, the nation overwhelming responded YES to a promise of hope.

And I will think to myself, maybe for just a minute...what a wonderful world.

Sigh

There are some nights where sleep will not, can not, come. Last night was one. I fell asleep late, woke up on the hour, every hour and then had to awake for good at 6 to begin my work day after two whole weeks off.

It appears that tonight is another night like the last. Anxiety has a grip on me, depression is sitting beside me although it hasn't quite climbed into my lap. I hate feeling this way--especially with no real reason at all.

Christmas is over. Thank god! So I will take down the tree tomorrow, tape up the christmas box and replace the calendar on my refrigerator and try to shake off the vacation haze that has surrounded me and remember to get back to the daily grind.

The birthday present for Dad (posted below) was delivered in DVD format to the birthday guy--he absolutely loved it, and my whole family did too. I am happy about that. It's been an interesting past few days and blog subjects aplenty are right on my fingertips...ruminations and reflections to come, soon. But not tonight.

Tonight I need my thoughts to skip along the surface of the water of my mind and settle on the other side so that I can have dreamless sleep.

Happy New Year. 2009 feels like a lucky one...